The Bee C   de

  • Courtney Bowie

Third Times A Charm

Updated: Jul 16

Being a mother is the most challenging job known in my opinion. You work extra long hours, holidays, weekends are mandatory in most cases and, don’t think about a vacation. It’s also an expensive job. Daycare alone for my two youngest children is over 2k a month. Why do people pick this non paying, very difficult yet, very important job? Well for me it was really simple- I was born to do it. These small people were picked for me and I accepted the challenge.

A recap on my previous experiences with labor and delivery, drama is the word that comes to mind lol. I was so anxious to give birth both times that I ended up having 2 C-Sections! In my defense, I felt like I could’ve pushed with my first child Dill but, the hospital had no patience with me at all. With my middle child Tj well, he was huge for me and after being in labor for hours and nothing happened, I was done. “Cut me open… Thanks” was exactly what I said and exactly what happened. Now, what I want to focus on is my youngest child (Your Majesty herself) my third times a charm, Lyric. The reason I refer to her as my “Third Times A Charm” is because everything was different this time. From the moment I really accepted the fact that I was going to be a mother again (and so soon), I just felt different. Lyric was the easiest pregnancy that I had out of the three. She and I didn’t start to show until about month 5, that was a first for me. Gaining only 25 lbs (Lyric was 6 of those lbs) and working until 37 weeks we were on the move.

With my first two children I had every intention to nurse them both. Needless to say this did not happen with either of them. I did pump for them both for a few weeks but, with T.J his demand was more then my supply and I just couldn’t commit. I want to say that it had everything to do with the healing process from the C-Section. It took me about a week to laugh without feeling like I was going to burst open. The stitches made it hard for me to get in and out of the bed. I was so worried about getting an infection; I wouldn’t go far and I wouldn’t move fast. I felt helpless and super drained.

This time I was determined to have it my way. Typically the doctors make you schedule a C-Section when you had two priors and never delivered vaginally. They don’t want to risk your scar rupturing and you bleeding out. It also can cause issues for the baby.. all in all it’s just a really big risk. My big argument was I had two children already and one of them is under the age of 5; I did not have time to heal for 3 weeks and care for them. My doctor understood completely and we pushed out my scheduled surgery until after my due date. This would give me time to go into labor on my own and try my best to stick to my birth plan.

On the Monday before I actually delivered (at about 8 am) I lost my mucus plug. I was so excited because I thought that a baby was sure to come after. Nope.. she was so small and comfortable that she just stayed tucked away. I had an appointment on Tuesday and, I had my nurse strip my membrane praying that this would do the trick. Nope.. still nothing. This is about the time I started to get bothered because, I was really done with being pregnant. I told myself that if I go past my due date that I will go ahead and have the C-Section.

At about 12 a.m. on September 29th I started to have real contractions. They weren’t to bad but they were coming. Because I didn’t want Beaumont to send me home (which they will) I waited. At 1:30a.m. I started to time the contractions and Jesus they were 4 minutes apart! I walked and, did squats and, bounced on the couch to try to ease the pain until the kids and their dad was ready to go. It was storming so bad out we almost couldn’t see while driving. The rain turned a 20 minute ride to what seemed like a 2654687525687 hour ride! I screamed the whole way.

Arriving at Beaumont all I could do was crawl, that is how bad it was. Everyone in triage was telling me how well I was doing and just be patient. I asked for drugs stat; I knew my plan and was determined. One very unprofessional nurse wanted to argue with me about my body and my decision to have a Vbac. She kept saying discouraging things like “what doctor would tell you this was ok” or “I’m almost positive that the doctor on call is not going to allow this” oh and my favorite one “Your doctor said what? Did you talk to her today?! because we don’t do that here.”. She didn’t know who I was clearly because, I was not having a C-Section! It was already in my file what my plan was and my doctor already talked to her team so, here is where I’ll insert the “I Told You So”.

After that Beautiful BEAUTIFULLLLLLL epidural (insert praise dance) I was calm but nervous. I had some self doubt and I cried a little because, what if I couldn’t do it? I already felt like less of a woman with the first two because of a C-Section; Lyric and I had to do it. Sidebar: the reason I had two C-Sections was because I would not dilate past 7 cm. I was already at 7 cm when I got to the hospital! Another issue I had was not being able to deliver with my own OB; I had a team mate deliver my first two children. I can’t even begin to describe the joy on my face when my doctor came into my delivery room and said “Hey! You ready to do this?”. That was the motivation that I needed to do what I said I was going to do.

When my doctor checked me and told me I was fully dilated I couldn’t believe it; I was ready to push. Shortly after starting my 1 2 3 push reps, I thought I seen the face of our maker Jesus Christ himself. When I say I wanted to quit get up and go back home and get in the bed! Chile, I was ready to go. The pressure was on, I had to get her out because a C-Section was not an option. I was willing to risk it all, even my life clearly, to get to this point. I had to follow through.. I had to get her out… I had to deliver. I’m blessed to say Lyric was born 1.5 hours later. All that fear, doubt, down talk from health professionals, pain, tears, sweat… It was all over. 6lbs and 10 oz with dark hair and a soft cry, I did what I said I was going to do.

When I got to hold her I felt accomplished and proud. We started the nursing process and it has been working for us so far. We occasionally have a latch issue but I make sure I pump for her and I have a nice freezer and fridge stash. I’m so happy about how much I saved by using free milk lol.

Lyric has made me feel like the Wonder Woman that I always knew I was; and granted the fact that she was a surprise baby, I’m thankful to her for this. All of my children have my heart. We are all growing together and learning as we go. So yes, this job doesn’t pay at all, it doesn’t give you the weekend off, yes it does come with sleepless nights and early mornings but, It’s my portion. I’m blessed to have them.

I will not be doing this again (at least no time soon for sure). I will have to pray and fast before another child comes from my womb honey . If you are pregnant or, thinking of becoming pregnant let me tell you; either way you deliver (C-section or vaginal) you are amazing! I will say the healing process from vaginal delivery is better. The delivery process with a C-Section is easiest.. you don’t work at all; it all depends on the mommy.

To sum up this post, giving birth to Lyric changed my outlook on lots of things. She showed me that it’s not too late for me to follow my dreams. She taught me that I am stronger than I think I am. She taught me so the -Explicit- what if people tell you no… you can’t.. that’s not how this normally works.. these are the rules; you do your own thing and get your own outcome.


XoXo

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